.04

"You block your dream when you allow fear to grow bigger than your faith"

- Mary Manin Morrissey

{forever 21 $10.50}

I bought this shirt to remind me of something.

After coming down from the high of my recent offer, I threw myself into research about my new town, university, people, and student loans. In the midst of this, I happened upon some quite unsavory comments about the school, the town, its people, its reputation...and I felt shame. For two whole nights, I felt myself quite gullible. I berated myself, believing in that instant that I was perpetually prone to making nonsensical decisions about my life. How could I possibly go from the frantic, pulsing pace of New York City, to the calm, seeming dullness of a miniature town in Wales?

My mind must have flipped everyday of this week, my decisions changing with the seconds and changes of the colors in the sky from night to day. But, then my other fellow English Soulmate, reminded me not to let the dream go. This English dream I've had from my first glimpse of union jack, or the time I could dress up like Baby Spice singing "Spice Up Your Life," or the time I fell for Rachel Weisz as Evy Carnahan in The Mummy, and now Rob and his friends.  Maybe Bangor is my Cambridge, or Oxford, and Oxford is for another time.  Maybe trading express busses and traffic jams for cobblestones, seafoam lakes, and mountain carved vistas are my open door to what I've always dreamed.

People will say a lot of things. They will attempt to dictate your life moment by moment. Maybe your picket fence is a flashy condominium, or your condo a small farm surrounded by faces you've seen and will see until God calls you back. But its yours. It's your dream, your reality: your soul place.

Don't let fear replace faith.

I have no idea how I am going to get the money for grad school. But I know a God Who has every resource.  He'll see me through, after all, He opened the door in the first place.

{forever 21 $5.50}

I bought this to add to my cameo collection!

Cheers